Networking and Sex

The theme of one of the sessions at the Referral Institute UK & Ireland Conference was 'Networking and Sex - The Perfect Combination!' Hazel Walker shared some great insights from the findings of research she has completed with Ivan Misner on the different approaches to networking between men and women. Her talk was all about helping men and women to network more effectively with each other. She shared some great advice on the subject of asking for referrals and expanded on the presentation from Mike Macedonio that I wrote about a couple of days ago (Are you stuck doing lots of networking with little reward?)

The research findings suggested that men can have a tendency to go for a referral before establishing a good relationship. On the other hand women can be happy to carry on with the relationship and never ask for a referral. So women need to learn from men about asking for referrals at the right time and men need to learn from women about nurturing relationships first.

Hazel used some great dating analogies to illustrate the different approaches between men and women. Her forthcoming book on the subject promises to be a great read!

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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Referral Marketing lessons from the Golf Course

Another speaker at the Referral Institute UK & Ireland Conference earlier this week was Mike Holman, Referral Institute Franchise owner and former Golf Professional. Mike entertained and educated us with the lessons to be learned from golf that can be applied to your referral marketing. In golf you generally have a specific target and play 9 or 18 holes accordingly. Unless you have a real vision for your business you cannot see & share the targets that will help you get there. Successful golf involves alignment, balance, timing and practice. It's the same in referral marketing. Your network needs to be aligned with what you do, the balance of giving and receiving needs to be right. In 'Are you stuck doing lots of networking with little reward?' yesterday I wrote about the relationship building that needs to be in place before the timing is right for profitable referrals.

Mike quoted Gary Player on the subject of practice when someone congratulated him on a lucky shot. Player agreed with the spectator and said "Yes and you know the more I practice the luckier I get!"

See this great video of Tiger Woods for someone who puts it all into practice on the golf course:


Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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Are you stuck doing lots of networking with little reward?

At the Referral Institute UK & Ireland Conference yesterday Mike Macedonio spoke about people who spend a lot of time networking, but who are effectively invisible. He spoke about the VCP process (tm) which is the acronym Dr. Ivan Misner uses for Visibility, Credibility, and Profitability.

Mike explained that you have to move through these stages in a referral relationship. This takes time, effort and commitment, but people often spend their time getting to meet lots & lots of people without ever getting to really know anyone. In practice profitability is achieved by going deep and establishing trusted relationships.

Visibility is only established when you know who someone is and what they do and they know the same about you.

Credibility is achieved when you each perceive each other to be reliable and worthy of confidence.

Profitability is when you are both consistently and proactively referring business to each other.

Does that mean that Visibility Networking is not important? No, you have to establish visibility first and that sort of networking will often be the place where you can introduce and find referrals for those in your Inner Network.

Read more about this in Mike's article 'Just Ask. Right? . . . No.'

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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A great example of follow up

Making sure you follow up with the people you meet is the vital 2nd step in building business relationships. It's often the thing that gets forgotten as business cards pile up in your office! The people that do follow up stand out and some of those really make a great impression.

Several weeks ago I met someone who promised to send me some information. A few days later the information arrived in the post along with a copy of a book we had been discussing. That has prompted further interactions which are the building blocks of a profitable business relationship.

Are you in the habit of regular follow up?

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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More on what networking is not

I met someone recently through networking who asked for a One2One meeting to 'explore possible ways of working together'. I agreed to the meeting, but the experience was entirely different. The other person did not approach it as a mutual exchange amd presented his business for the entire time. Instead of a One2One it was more of a One@One!

Building trusted relationships is fundamental to getting results from business networking. These take time and include many exchanges of help, support and referrals. It is often within One on One or One2One meetings that these exchanges take place. Make sure you approach One2Ones in the right spirit of building relationships through mutual exchange.

See 'How to have a good One2One meeting' for more on the subject.

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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Networking is still not about selling

I have blogged before that networking is not selling yet I still meet people at networking events that are intent on selling to the room. I was at an event the other day where a couple of people were complaining that they had got clients the first couple of times they attended, but those sorts of people didn't come any more.

What a shock. They were probably put off by people selling to them all the time. As I often write networking is not about selling directly. If you build relationships in the right way then you don't have to sell. Your network does it for you!

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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What is important in your World?

In response to my post 'What you say is less important' Christopher Neufeld said "An excellent point, although it should take note that you need to get the other person to open up and start discussing what is important to both of you."

He is right about the need to engage with someone in order to start a conversation or get them to 'open up' as he put it. The things that really engage someone are those that are important in their world. I was speaking at a recent event for the owners of independent retail and catering businesses about generating business in the run up to Christmas. The brief was excellent because it summarised the main concerns they have right now which meant the speakers could address those immediately and engage from the start.

It's the same in a One on One or small group. To engage and start a conversation ask questions about the issues they have. It's those conversations that create the connections that start the networking process.

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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Which email grabbed my attention?

I received an email earlier this week which included "I have an event coming up ... can you promote to to your network". As you might imagine I get many such requests. The same day another email arrived which included "I am just putting together next month's newsletter, do you have an event in November you would like us to promote?" I know that he has an event that he would like me to promote, but he has offered to do something for me first.

He understands that in business networking it is important to give first before you receive.

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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How recently have you been in touch?

I was involved in a discussion yesterday about the importance of the Christmas Trading period to many in the retail and leisure trades. With the year many of them have had it could well be make or break time. Now is the time to act to ensure they maximise their business in the next couple of months.

One thing that came up in the discussion was the goldmine that many of them are sitting on without realising it. The gold in this mine is their existing customers. Many businesses concentrate on looking for new customers all the time and forget those people they have already done business with.

Make sure you keep in regular contact with people you have already done business with. Give them some added value and they may well spend more with you. Do it consistently and they will be amongst your best sources of new business from the people they know and influence.

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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A good beginning, middle & end

In a One2One meeting last week the other person was describing an unsatisfactory experience at a networking event. I asked what had happened and she said "people turned up at the appointed time, refreshments were served, there was a speaker and then at the time it was supposed to finish people began drifting off".

I remember in English lessons at school being taught the importance of a good beginning, middle and end in writing a story. It struck me that my friend had described something with no satisfactory beginning or end. The importance of a good beginning and end applies to any good networking or other business experience.

In my experience people like to know what to expect at the start. They also like to know it will finish on time. They can then enjoy and make the most of it.

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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Habit one in blunt terms from Brad Burton

I wrote recently about applying Stephen Coveys 7 habits of highly successful people to business networking. Habit one is 'Be Proactive' or as Brad Burton puts it in the title of his new book, 'Get off your Arse!'.

I interviewed Brad for this article on The National Networker and asked him about the title amongst other things.

Brad shared this "I’m not one for controversy. Look the basics of any business is getting off your arse its that simple, no point in looking at an excel document, I encounter many Spreadsheet millionaires, each week its easy making money on spreadsheets I’ve done it 100’s of times. But unless you get off your arse that spreadsheet is never going to happen. And it’s an honest call to action to anyone in business of any size to look at the way you are doing things and begin to do things differently, not just for the sake of doing things differently...".

More from Brad in the full article at the National Networker here >>>.

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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How can you be targeted with your networking?

The question of who to network with and where came up a couple of times this week. Once in a One2One Meeting and also in some networking training I delivered to a group of Non Executive Directors and Consultants.

If your existing network is not generating enough word of mouth to achieve your business targets then joining the right networking groups could be a sensible option. If you are clear about your target market you can begin to be targeted with your networking. You can establish who else is likely to have access to and influence with them, find where they network and join the groups they belong to.

Take the time to get to know the members and the ways you can help - support, information & introductions. When asked present your proposition confidently & consistently. Things to include are your target market, the problems you solve and stories to illustrate your expertise. Over time as you build your reputation and relationships the support and help you provide gets reciprocated.

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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Beautiful Wife, Marvellous Mother, Loyal Friend

Today I attended the funeral for Susie Sharman, the wife of my colleague Kim Sharman. It was a lovely celebration of Susie's life and her influence on family, friends and others she came into contact with.

She leaves the World a better place as a result of her life and will be buried tomorrow with these words on her headstone:

Beautiful Wife
Marvellous Mother
Loyal Friend

A great way to be remembered and you can read more at www.rosiebear.co.uk

Dave Clarke

Keeping track of your referrals 2

I wrote yesterday about the importance of keeping track of your referrals. You may think that is limited to direct contact of some sort, but I have also found that much of the business generated via the internet has its root in referrals and word of mouth. I was phoned a few weeks ago by someone interested in opening a new NRG Group in an area we don't cover. I asked how he had found us & he said Google. When we met I asked the question again. Whilst it was true that he had found our website via Google it was because someone we both know had suggested me to him. I was able then to thank the referral source and update him with what had happened.

Many of the people who found us via google also turn out to be via Word of Mouth. More than half of the  searches  that found our website include NRG suggesting someone recommended or referred them in the first place.

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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Keeping track of your referrals

I facilitated a networking breakfast on Friday 7 at the end one of the visiting members asked if she could say a few words. She shared that the NRG business networking group she belonged to had been a great factor in her success. Much of her business was a result of the relationships she had made in the group. It was not all, however, down to direct referrals. It was sometimes 2, 3, 4, 5 or even 6 steps removed, but by tracking back to the initial source she knew which relationships were critical to maintain & nurture.

If you don't keep track in this way you run the risk of upsetting your referral sources by not keeping them up to date with the results of the positive Word of Mouth they are generating for you. You could potentially miscalculate the return on investment on some of your activities and end up dropping some for the wrong reasons.

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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Are you clear about what you do and who for?

After a seminar yesterday on building business with the effective use of offline & online networks I had a conversation with a couple of the attendees about clarity of message. During the seminar there was general agreement that the more specific you can be about proposition the better. If people know exactly what you do and who for it is much easier to find referrals for you. One person mentioned someone they knew, liked and trusted but found it too difficult to find opportunities because they positioned themselves too generally and for any business whatever the size.

It is much better to be a specialist than a generalist. It is also much better to have a specific target market or market sector. Being a generalist for everyone is a very crowded space. The following image helped people to focus on this:

If you do not consider yourself to have a specific market sector then at least try to position yourself as a specialist. And if you really are a generalist at least try and define a market sector. That could be for example by business type, size, geography or a particular problem that you solve.

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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Who should you invite along to your networking group?

Over lunch yesterday I was chatting with some colleagues about inviting guests to a networking group we belong to. One name was mentioned and someone said "No, all he will do is see it as a selling opportunity and give everyone the hard sell".

We then had a discussion about who would be right and someone summed it up nicely "I will invite the people who always look to add value first in any interaction. That's always a good sign that they understand the importance of building relationships first".

She was absolutely right. It's the people who give value first who will receive huge value in the long term.

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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Faster relationship building with Social Networks

In 'Can you accelerate trust?' I wrote about the process of building trust in business networking. The question of the time it takes came up again today in an NRG seminar on building business with the effective use of offline & online networks.

It takes time and regular interaction to build relationships as this graphic illustrates:

The old tools we had - address book, phone, mail and various face to face interactions have been supplemented by email and now social media and social networks.

That can help to make it all much quicker!

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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Are you keeping up with your conversations online

I have blogged before about using Social Media and Social Networks to listen and engage in conversations. Here are a couple of examples from the last couple of days to illustrate this.

On Friday I blogged 'What is this #FollowFriday on Twitter?' and one of the people I mentioned was Jon Davey. Yesterday I received an email from Jon in reply because he had been alerted by Google Alerts. One of the thing he uses that for is to listen for mentions of 'Business in Berkshire'.

Yesterday I blogged 'Does it really cost that much?' and Nigel Morgan replied on Twitter, "If you question the value of networking, check the mirror!". A couple of people replied to Nigel on Twitter and then Nigel replied again, but on my Linkedin profile this time.

Are you listening and engaging online about things relevant to you and your business?

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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Does it really cost that much?

I have attended a few meetings recently where the attendees seemed to expect a professionally run event with profitable results, but without really paying anything. Do they all provide their services at no real cost?

Someone emailed me recently to ask about a networking event "does a meal really cost that much at ...?"

I answered "No, but running a professional organisation with high quality facilitation and attendees does. They are not a non profit!"

Networking in the right group means building trusted relationship that both increase the speed and lower the cost of business development. What value do you place on that?

See these blog posts for more on speed and cost of business development in business networking:

The value of networking for advocates
Saving time with organised networking

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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What is this #FollowFriday on Twitter?

In a One on One meeting earlier this week the other person said to me "I have just joined Twitter, what is this #FollowFriday?" I explained that on Fridays many people tweet the names of Twitter users they would like others to follow and tag the update with #followfriday. "Who would you recommend?" she said.

So far I have advocated these experts in their respective fields:

@ajwilcox Mind mapping generally and Mind Manager specifically
@andylopata Advice on effective business networking strategy
@AlanRae helpful stuff for growing businesses and aspiring entrepreneurs
@askten interesting facts daily
@BernieJMitchell Everything networking in Kings Cross and Olympic 2012 Boroughs
@BookMarkLee Helping accountants and those who want to work with accountants
@GrahamJones Great insights on using the internet to really connect with people
@jondavey Business in Berkshire and New Business Leads
@nicktadd Help with twitter & other Social Media
@Nigel_Morgan PR advice on creating a great reputation
@NigelTemple Practical small business marketing hints & tips
@Richard_White Daily sales tips and recommendations from the Accidental Salesman®
@Rodsloane No bull small business marketing
@Thebookwright Unleash that book inside you...!

For the history of how this all developed see '#FollowFriday: The Anatomy of a Twitter Trend'

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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Can you accelerate trust?

At a recent event someone posed the question "what can we do to accelerate the building of trust within the group?" It's a good question as successful networking relies on the building of trust. I think there are some essential ingredients for building trust in a group including leadership and facilitation. The members must also 'buy in' to the process and be proactive.

A few years back we conducted some research into the importance of developing trust in business relationships as part of networking. The article 'Have you unlocked the benefits of business networking?' includes a link to the full findings. It includes a breakdown of the trust building process in business networking. If you are proactive and follow this you can accelerate the building of trust, particularly if you join the right networking group for you.

As I wrote in 'How to build trust in business relationships':

Building a trusted business relationship in a networking context is a simple process:
1. Make contact
2. Follow up
3. Form relationships
4. Develop Advocates

Like many simple things that does not mean it is easy!

These previous blog posts also address the issue of building trust in business networking:

The killer app in business networking
Building trust in networking
Nothing compares to the power of trust
Building trust with a new contact
Behaviours that build trust
What’s your NRG? Part Two.

Good Networking!
Dave Clarke
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